Final Run at White Pass

**For the beginning of this story, read the previous post**

Felt like a real skier at this point!  Really feeling confident.  We went up a much larger chairlift to a new run.  It would combine with the run we had down four times already which was great.  Again, the view made me breathless.  It was so quiet, snow was softer and easier to maneuver on and it was such an amazing adventure.

Started off with a smooth run between the trees and it was just Jeremy and I.  Noone else around.  Couldn't hear anything but our skis moving through the snow.  Until...

We come to the top of this really steep portion.  It divides two ways.  You have to go between two sets of trees to 'coast' your way up the next part.  I should have followed my gut, taken off my skis and walked to the bottom of that hill.  All I could feel inside was panic.  It wasn't wide enough to do my plough moving sideways down the steep hill.  It wasn't long enough to feel comfortable doing it.

Jeremy started explaining how to get down the hill:  "Ok.  This part will be hard.  You have to stay with your feet facing front and direct yourself to the path on the left.  Your body will use the momentum to get up the part on the side.  Do you think you can stay straight?  So keep...."

And I was off.  I figured that if I didn't just go down that portion, I would never do it and we'd need someone to come get me as I was really fearful.  Best way to get over fears is to face them.  I did just that.  Jeremy was still trying to give me advice - advice I did need - but I was quickly talking myself out of it in my head and took what he had said to 'help.'  Then panic set in. Quick.

I felt myself going fast!  Got fearful and sat down on my skis.  Because that's how you handle fear when you're going fast down a hill when skiing.  You sit on your skis.  Puts you closer to the ground.  Gives you better balance?!  (no)  Allows you to get up the hill?! (no)

Jeremy said he thought I might make it because I was looking good at first.  Then one of my legs went out, I went forward and slammed my head into the ground on the front left side of my face.  My skis had both popped off my feet and I was laying on the ground.  My head hurt on the left side where my goggles had pushed into my face hard.  I felt ok.  Just embarrassed and scared.

Jeremy skied down to me as I was holding my head.  My lip was bleeding a little, but stopped quickly.  He asked if I was ok and I told him that I was, but my head hurt a little.  He had thought I was crying, but I was just a little more in shock than anything.  I got up and we walked our way up a short part of the trail.  And skied the rest of the way down the mountain to the base.  That was the hardest part.

I was quite shaken inside and mentally tired.  I had to fight fear the rest of the way down.  I couldn't stop thinking that I was going to crash, break something, hurt myself, or lose my balance again.  I had to mentally talk myself through the course even though I had just skied several times down this path and skied it well.  It was a long way down.  And yet, I didn't fall again the whole way down.

Running makes you such a positive person mentally because you have to believe you can do it.  I used that strategy to help get down the mountain.  The other mentally positive thing that was of as much or even more help was Jeremy.  He was so encouraging the whole way down.  Encouraged me the entire day.  Spoke positive words of "You are amazing.  You're doing great.  Wow - you did it!  Look at you go!"  Helped so much!!  And he was right - I did do it.

Will I ski again?  Absolutely!!  But I'll take a lesson on how to get over that hill if ever I have to face it again.

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